


Not just yet

by Snop



Category: Basketball RPF
Genre: M/M, NBA, Okc thunder, golden state Warriors - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-13
Updated: 2017-05-13
Packaged: 2018-10-31 08:00:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10895088
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snop/pseuds/Snop
Summary: It's Game Seven of the NBA Finals. It's KD's big moment to prove to everyone that he made the right decision and to finally become an NBA Champion. So why doesn't he feel nervous, or excited, or even confident? It seems odd that he could head into such a big game feeling nothing at all.





	Not just yet

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own any of these characters. This entire story is completely fictional and did not happen in real life.

All around him locker room buzzed with excitement and nervous energy. In one corner, McAdoo was pacing, unable to keep his lanky body still. Klay, on the other hand, could almost pass off as relaxed to the untrained eye. But his brow was a bit too furrowed and his knee bounced a bit two quickly. Steph, as usual, was in the center of the room, making jokes and keeping the mood as light as possible. But even his charisma couldn’t quell the anxious mood. His teammates had every right to be anxious. Tonight they were playing in Game Seven of the NBA Finals, and Kevin guessed that many of the guys were having uncomfortable flashbacks to the last time they had been in this position. This year, however, the Warriors had some momentum, having won the last two games of the series. Glancing around the locker room, he had no doubt that this team was capable of winning tonight, even against the dangerous Cleveland squad. They would need every single player to perform, but the Warriors could definitely do it.

So why didn’t he feel more excited? Why didn’t he feel nervous, or determined, or even confident? Every since he was little kid, he had dreamed about this moment. All those hours in the gym, all those early morning practices, all those late nights watching film, all the shit he’d taken from people since arriving in this city, all of that had been for the sole purpose of getting him here. Tonight was the chance to fulfill his dreams, and to prove to the world that he’d made the right choice. It was probably the biggest game of his entire life. And yet, he felt nothing. No nerves, no excitement. Just emptiness.

 

In his head, he heard Russell Westbrook’s voice: “Get out of that big head of yours and just live for a second.”

 

Kevin couldn’t help but smile at that. Russ always seemed to know exactly what to say when he was in these kinds of moods. It was just the kind of thing that happened when you were that close to someone for so long. He had missed that a lot this year, that feeling of knowing there was someone you could depend, on no matter what. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust his new teammates, but whatever it was that he’d had with Russ was just different. Very different.

For just a second, he was back in Oklahoma. It was a very different game, a long time ago. It wasn’t McAdoo pacing, it was James. And in the other corner was Serge, listening to his music with his knee bouncing and his brow furrowed. In the center of it all was Russ, practically glowing with excitement. That was the thing about Russell: No matter how much pressure rested on him that night, he still saw it as a chance to play the game he loved. It was rubbing off on the guys, especially the younger and more nervous ones. They were calming down, starting to feel more at ease. That was another thing about Russell: He was contagious. When he was playing with that crazy, Tasmanian Devil pace, you couldn’t help but put more passion into your own game. And when he smiled, it was almost impossible not to smile back.

There were a lot of things that he liked about Russell, but his smiles were probably Kevin’s favorite. Like that ear-to-ear grin he would get when he was proud of a joke he’d make. Or the way he curled his lip when he made a particularly good dunk. Or that sweet, small smile he wore after Kevin kissed him. Hell, even that stupid smirk he that crossed his face when he had said “Stings for who?” was wonderful.

Well, it appeared Kevin had gotten his wish. He certainly no longer felt devoid of feelings. Instead, he felt them piling on top of each other, filling him up, until he felt like he was about to drown in them.

He was back in Oklahoma again and this time all he saw was Russ, talking and laughing with his teammates. Playing with that manic gleam in his eyes and never seeming to get tired. He was just the same as he had been five years ago, except when their eyes met, there was no familiar sparkle. That was what hurt the most. He wanted Russ to scowl, to yell, to do something because Russ always did something when he was mad. But instead he just stared blankly right through Kevin, as though he wasn’t even there. As though all those years, all those wins when they had lept into the air in sheer joy together, all those bitter losses that had left them silent in the locker room, all those times they had woken up holding each other, as though all of that wasn’t even there.

He wanted to be angry with Russ for ignoring him, for pretending like all those years of their relationship had been a dream, or worse, meaningless. But he couldn't be mad, because he knew that Russell wasn't the one who'd thrown it all away. Kevin was the one who had left, who had prioritized a ring over his best friend.

 

It was all his fault.

 

Kevin took a deep breath. Sitting here, wallowing in his own misery, was not going to change anything. What he did was done, and there was no undoing it. All he could do now was make the best of it. He took another breath, and another, slowly pulling himself back together. Tonight, he was going to play his best, and he was going to win a championship. Yes, he was going to win a ring, finally, even if it wasn't in the way he'd hoped. He still couldn't muster up any excitement, but he knew once he was on the court, it would come. After all, this was still another chance to play the game he loved.

Maybe after the game he'd give Russ a call. Of course, he probably hated Kevin at this point, as he had every right to do. But maybe, just maybe, there was some way he could fix things. He knew it would take a long time to get their relationship even close to where it was, but he also knew that he was just as hopelessly in love with Russ as he had been five years ago.

And Kevin wasn't ready to give up on that just yet.


End file.
